WHAT AM I DOING HERE?

That depends on what you mean.

If you mean 'what am I doing on this website', then hopefully you're interested in odd, abstract humour, because that's the best I can do for you.

If you mean 'what am I doing here' in general though, I can't help you with that. None of us know, but hopefully if you lie down on the pavement for long enough the answer to your question will come before someone tells you to move. If you find out, please let me know though.